Humour

Hat tip to the Winged Victory Women in Aviation Webzine for posting this Women Airforce Service Pilots (WASP) trainee alphabet by Mary Hart. No doubt its still useful for student pilots even today!

A is for Airplane a gadget designed
For scaring the student plumb out of her mind.

B is for Brakes on the same which is splendid,
But use them too sharp and you’ll end up upended,

C is for Compass installed with much cost
In function best suited for getting you lost.

D is for Details you mustn’t forget,
Like safety belt fastened or parking brake set.

E’s Elevators affixed to the tail;
If not used in time nothing else will avail

F is for Flaps, which are tricky and fickle,
But without these addenda, you’d be in a pickle.

G’s Gosports, which surely need no introduction;
They’re for learning new cuss words’ and other instruction

H is for Headwind, built in or external:
In violence unequalled, in purpose infernal

I is for Instruments–none of them care to
Tell you a thing–take their word if you dare to.

J is for Jolts which you get in the air
And the height that you had which is no longer there.

K is for Kicks which are aimed at the rudder;
The way these are given make a check pilot shudder.

L is for Looking and all of that drivel!
Rebuild your neck, pal, so’s to make it full swivel!

M is for Motor; if it quits, you can bet you
De Lawd’s on your side, for Green Pastures will get you,

N is for Nose which is always surprisin’
By never remaining upon the horizon

O is for Off, which is where for the switches
When, parked, or you’ll hear from those strict sons of—Texas

P is for Pilot; that’s you—on condition
You don’t spin too low or not check your ignition.

Q is got questions -that need understanding—
Clean forgot by the time you have come in from landing

R is for Rudder, to use in each antic;
It drives airplanes sideways, the rest of us frantic.

S is for Slipstream to complicate matters
With torque, until everyone’s mad as mad hatters.

T is for Throttle, controlling the go-juice;
Without this device trying to aviate’s no use.

U is for Up, and the Upper the better;
For the higher you are the more spots you can set her.

V is Velocity; nothing can stop it;
Once you’ve too much, you must climb up to drop it.

W’s Wobble-pump—use debatable
It aids most in making the starting quite hateable.

X marks the spot where the landing gear hit;
Three points was the aim but two points was what lit

Y is for yes which is all you can say
When the board says a check ride is headed your way.

Z is for zealous, our attitude truly
If held to the end we will graduate duly.