“Unknown airport with Cessna 150 circling overhead, identify yourself…”
Who do you believe…?
Allegedly heard while on ground control in MIA:
VIRGIN Flt: "Every time I come to MIA you women controllers give us a hard time!"
ATC: "For the nine years I have been a controller, I have never had a problem handling a VIRGIN…."
It could be worst…
The only thing worse than a captain who never flew as copilot is a copilot who once was a captain…
Captains beware…
Be nice to your first officer, he may be your captain at your next airline…
Who would you choose…?!!
Allegedly heard on a Southwest Airlines flight:
Welcome aboard Southwest Flight XXX to YYY. To operate your seatbelt, insert the metal tab into the buckle, and pull tight. It works just like every other seatbelt, and if you don’t know how to operate one, you probably shouldn’t be out in public unsupervised.
In the event of a sudden loss of cabin pressure, oxygen masks will descend from the ceiling. Stop screaming, grab the mask, and pull it over your face.
If you have a small child traveling with you, secure your mask before assisting with theirs. If you are traveling with two small children, decide now which one you love more.
Gatwick passengers have been warned…
When we were taxiing to our gate after a BA flight from NCL-LGW, the captain thanked the passengers for flying BA and that he hoped we’d fly with them again, you know the usual stuff. Then he proceeded to warn us:
If you’re leaving Gatwick by car, please be aware of Police speed cameras which are plentiful at the moment, If you are caught speeding by one of these cameras you will be liable to a £100.00 fine, and for that you could fly with us to Venice or many other beautiful European cities!
(Allegedly overheard on a flight some years ago, hence why the indicated fine is only £100.00 and the airline is not Ryanair!)